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Self care during the holidays

Hey Collectors! Many times when I work with people they do not have good self- care. They beat themselves up over their clutter or disorganization. They may become anxious or depressed and let self-care slide.

The holidays can be very stressful, so now is a great time to implement a self-care routine if you don’t already have one. Especially if you get anxious or overwhelmed or upset during the holidays, now is the time to be gentle with yourself.

When we take care of ourselves, we are less likely to fill our lives up with things or feel the need to fill a void through shopping. When we love and are good to ourselves, we want to declutter and have our place feel good. When we take care of ourselves, we will make our doctor appointments or see our therapist.

I am a fan of having a plan in place. I would suggest that you write down all the ways you can take care of yourself. Take it a step further and write it down on your to do list or on your calendar.

Remember, it doesn’t have to be huge. I think a lot of times we think we need to go spend a day at the spa or spend lots of money to make self-care count. We don’t. Sometimes it is the little things that can really have an impact.

Here are some of my favorite ways to take care of myself during the Holidays or any time of the year!

1. Get a massage. Low on cash? See if there is a school in your area where students need people to practice on.

2. Take a walk. Being outdoors can really rejuvenate your spirits.

3. Take a hot bubble bath. A good soak is good for the soul.

4. Be silly. Whether you do a silly walk, make silly faces or act silly with a friend, lighten your mental worry with silliness.

5. Share your smile. Sometimes sharing your smile with someone can make a huge difference in their day. It also makes you feel good.

6. Shake it off. Get up and dance. Get your heart rate up and boogie.

7. Name all the things you love about yourself. If you get stuck, ask a good friend or family member to tell you what they love about you.

8. Eat a healthy meal. Get a yummy chopped salad or salmon and broccoli. When we fuel our body with the good stuff we can see it.

9. Help someone. When we help others, we feel good about ourselves. We realize we do have things to offer to people.

10. Read a book about something that interests you or you have always wanted to know about.

There are many ways to get self-care and this is one small list to get you started. Write down all the things you would like to do.

What are your favorite tips for having good self care during the holidays? What are your biggest challenges for taking care of yourself? Share in the comments below.

Are you too overwhelmed with clutter to have take carae of yourself? Would you like caring, compassionate professionals help you declutter and get organized? Do you need to spend less time on clutter and more time on you? Collector Care can help you whether you are a hoarder that needs a complete overhaul or you simply need a few rooms organized.

Call Collector Care at 925.548.7750 or email rachel@collectorcare.com to schedule your free 30-minute consultation and learn about how we can help you!

Photo credit: http://avivahwerner.com/2017/06/25/self-care-just-do-it/

How to help your loved one who hoards

Hey Collectors! When we work with clients, many times we also work with their families, whether it is a spouse, child or parent. When someone you love hoards, it can be incredibly frustrating. You love the person but you also might be going a bit insane trying to help them clear their clutter.

It doesn’t have to be a family member; it could be someone you are dating, a friend or a neighbor. You are most likely concerned about their safety and what you can do to help them. I know you are coming from a place of concern and you want them to be healthy and happy.

home of a hoarder

Here are five tips to on how you can help someone you love that is a hoarder:

  1. Be non-judgmental. Instead of verbally attacking or ridiculing the person, try and understand what they are going through. Are they battling depression? Physically incapable? Try and understand why they are having a hard time.

  2. Suggest therapy. A lot of the reasons why people hoard and hang onto things are because they have been through something traumatic. When they are able to release the trauma and emotions, it will be easier to let the physical clutter go.

  3. Hire a professional organizer. By hiring a professional organizer, you have a non-objective party. Your loved one feels like they have a fair chance to explain their side and express their concerns.

  4. Offer to help. If your friend is disabled or elderly, perhaps they need help picking up garbage and taking out the trash or help with laundry. Try and find some simple tasks that you can do to help on a regular basis.

  5. Listen. Perhaps you are only hearing a defensive response to your judgmental calm. By listening to why this person feels the way they do and why they are in the place they are, will help you better serve them. A lot of times we plan what to say next, or talk over someone because we are frustrated. Try and listen.

Rachel Seavey Owner of Collector Care Professional Organizers

I also wanted to include five things NOT to do to your hoarder. If you do any of these things, most likely they will continue to hoard, and possibly shut you out of their life.

  1. Judge. You might think your friend is gross, out of their mind, etc. You don’t have to share that because it isn’t helpful. They are already going through a hard time. Tough love does not help a hoarder.

  2. Arranging a clean up while they are away. Unfortunately, I hear this story all of the time. This only makes the person resentful, angry and more likely to hoard more to replace what you tossed and maybe a bit for spite. A client shared that being cleaned out while she was in the hospital was one of the worst things she ever felt. She compared it to being raped in college and felt absolutely violated.

  3. Throwing away stuff when they aren’t looking. Sure, it’s tempting, but it doesn’t stop their behavior and doesn’t really help. If and when they catch you, you might not be allowed back in.

  4. Call a professional organizer or clean up on their behalf. I know you would like to tell me to go on over to your mother’s house and clean it. I do virtual coaching and advising, but will not, and hopefully no other trained professional will, work with someone who hasn’t personally invited me over. You have to get your loved one on the same page and can’t just arrange help for them. If you do, it makes it awkward for everyone involved.

  5. Call the police. Unless your family or friend is in immediate harm or danger, always allow them to clean out before enforcement is involved. A lot of the times they will be bombarded with fees and fines, and you could force them into bankruptcy.

Is someone you love a hoarder? Have you tried to help but haven’t been able to make any progress? Would you like to know how you could help them once their clutter has been removed? Collector Care can help you work together as a team and reduce your stress.

Call Collector Care at 925.548.7750 or email rachel@collectorcare.com to schedule your free 30-minute consultation and learn about how we can help you!

Photo credit: http://www.slate.com/blogs/behold/2013/12/30/paula_salischiker_photographs_hoarders_in_britain_in_her_series_the_art.html

Depression and Clutter – Tips on tackling both!

Hey Collectors! With the holidays coming up, many people find themselves depressed. Clutter can also cause depression.

Which came first? If you weren’t depressed before clutter, you more than likely feel down about your surroundings now. Depression might be one of the reasons you have clutter. By identifying why you clutter, you can brainstorm ideas to help you more easily declutter.

People tend to suppress depression through overeating or over shopping, doing drugs or excessive drinking. It’s easier to be distracted and not deal with pain, grief, embarrassment, and shame.

depression and clutter

If you are open to my suggestions, here are five tips I believe can help your depression and clutter. Tackling your depression will lead to more clarity about the clutter in your home.

1. Seek professional help. Find out what’s best for you through your health care plan. Find out costs and out of pocket expenses. Ask friends for recommendations; do research, check out reviews on Yelp. You could see a psychiatrist or a therapist, or both. Both are trained to help with depression and can offer options such as medication or cognitive behavior therapy. There are several ways to help your depression and a licensed medical professional will help you decide what is best for you.

2. Prayer and meditation. Depending on your religious or spiritual beliefs, reach out to the powers around you to help you.

3. Share some of your pain with a trusted friend or family member. We tend to clutter our hearts with overflowing shame. Letting go of a lot of that will help you feel lighter emotionally.

4. Write in a journal or keep a diary. We tend to clutter our hearts and mind with overflowing emotional pain. By letting go of some of those negative emotions, you allow your heart and your mind more room for love and tenderness. You don’t have to reread your journal or keep it. You may choose to burn it and release all of the negative energy and emotions. The hope is this will help you declutter your heart and your mind.

5. Be good to yourself. Stop punishing yourself! Take a shower. Let the water run through your hair, gently wash your face, brush your teeth, eat healthy, and get exercise.

How would you take care of a dear friend or family member that was in pain? Take a moment to think about a person and how you would take care of them if they were in your position. Knowing you my dear collectors, you would be right by their side, nursing them back to health and giving the shirt off your back. People do much more for others they care about than they do for themselves. It’s time to treat yourself like you treat others.

I hope you feel better soon, Collectors, if you have been feeling depressed and that these five tips helped you.

Don’t forget to check out all Hoardganize episodes and see what other topics I have been exploring on Scratching the Surface: http://hoardganize.libsyn.com.

Does your clutter make you depressed? Have you become depressed because of your clutter? Are you overwhelmed and keep trying unsuccessfully to get started? Collector Care can help! We are compassionate and non-judgmental and can get you organized, help with hoarding or clearing clutter in your home or business.

Call Collector Care at 925.548.7750 or email rachel@collectorcare.com to schedule your free 30-minute consultation and learn about how we can help you need a little support or a whole team.

Photo credit: http://www.playbuzz.com/animeshinigami1110/could-you-have-depression